Preseason Takes Met Their Maker

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College football decided that blood clots, docuseries cancellations, and a $50 million lifeline were totally normal this week. Which honestly? Feels about right for a sport where a backup kicker has more control over your weekend mood than your actual plans.

Welcome back to the chaos you choose every Saturday.

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📰 Two-Minute Drill

Coach Prime Back At Practice After Blood Clot Procedure
Deion Sanders returned to Colorado practice a day after a procedure related to blood clots. His rapid comeback steadies a program that lives on the front page and matters for anyone handicapping how the Buffs handle the week.
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Stanford Lands a $50 Million Lifeline
Former Cardinal player Bradford M. Freeman donated $50 million to Stanford football, a record gift aimed at accelerating the rebuild. Money talks, and in Palo Alto it now funds scholarships, support, and a path out of the wilderness.
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Police Say Kyren Lacy Sparked Fatal Crash
Louisiana State Police released new evidence asserting former LSU WR Kyren Lacy’s reckless driving triggered a December 2024 crash that killed a 78-year-old man. It is a grim legal chapter that continues to shadow the program’s recent past.
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UNC Pulls Plug On Hulu Doc Mid-Slog
With a 2-3 start souring the vibes, North Carolina shelved an in-season Hulu documentary project, per report. When the cameras go dark in October, the editing room could not save the plot. Don’t forget the rumors he will be fired soon.
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NCAA Sets Single January Portal Window
The Division I Administrative Committee adopted a single Jan 2 to 16 transfer portal window for FBS and FCS starting in 2026. Fewer December distractions, more bowl prep, and two chilly weeks of roster reshuffling.
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🍿 The Popcorn Games

No. 6 Oklahoma vs Texas
📍 Cotton Bowl, Dallas, TX
🕒 Saturday, 3:30 PM ET on ABC
Red River needs no hype, it just needs chaos. Texas is licking wounds, Oklahoma brings a top 10 badge and a defense that actually tackles. Neutral site, split crowd, and a thousand momentum swings waiting to happen.

No. 3 Oregon vs No. 7 Indiana
📍 Autzen Stadium, Eugene, OR
🕒 Saturday, 3:30 PM ET on CBS
Top 10 collision with Autzen’s decibel meter on tilt. Oregon’s balance meets Indiana’s fastball offense, and the winner grabs a prime seat in the Big Ten and CFP conversation. If the Ducks’ edge rush heats up, the party gets green and loud.

No. 1 Ohio State at No. 17 Illinois
📍 Memorial Stadium, Champaign, IL
🕒 Saturday, 12:00 PM ET on FOX
Orange Out meets the nation’s No. 1 for a noon-anxiety special. Illinois has the pass rush and crowd to muddy the picture, Ohio State has the horsepower to blow it open if explosives hit. Survive and advance vibes with Big Ten stakes attached.

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Bet Your Team On That Guy 🏈

Ahmad Hardy, RB, Soph., Missouri

Why he’s the guy: Missouri’s offense flips from solid to soul-crushing when Hardy gets rolling. He has opened the season with five straight 100-yard games, including 250 and 3 TD against Louisiana, and he leads the SEC in both yards and headaches created for arm tacklers. The contact balance is mean, the vision is calm, and every second-and-6 feels like a scheduled first down.

Recent heater: Last three games, 250 and 3 vs Louisiana, 138 and 2 vs South Carolina, 130 and 1 vs UMass. The yards after contact keep stacking, and the explosive runs arrive in bunches, not singles.

How he wins: One-cut decisiveness in inside zone, patient tempo to let doubles climb, then burst through the crease. He rarely takes a square hit, so the pile keeps moving, and he punishes single-high looks when Missouri uses pistol play action to widen the alley.

Team MVP case: Hardy’s success lightens the box for Missouri’s passing game, lets Beau Pribula live in play-action, and keeps the defense fresh by shrinking opponent possessions. Without him, Missouri has to live on chunk throws. With him, the Tigers bully the game script and wear out fourth quarters.

This week’s stakes: No. 14 Missouri hosts No. 8 Alabama at Faurot Field on Saturday at noon ET on ABC, a real SEC hinge game. A strong Hardy game means time of possession, short third downs, and a very loud Columbia. If he hits explosives early, the upset meter starts blinking.

🩼 The Walking Boot – Injury Update

John Mateer, QB – Oklahoma
Oklahoma’s offense is holding its breath after QB1 underwent surgery on his throwing hand, leaving Red River prep in flux. The injury came in late September, and he has reportedly pushed to practice in some capacity this week, but grip strength and ball security are real questions. If he cannot go, Michael Hawkins Jr. likely starts, shrinking OU’s vertical menu. Fantasy managers should treat Mateer as a true game-time decision.

CJ Baxter, RB – Texas
The Longhorns will have to lean on Jerrick Gibson and the freshmen for the time being after CJ Baxter’s hamstring flared, sending him to the sideline early and keeping his status in the questionable range. Soft-tissue plus speed role equals snap-count risk even if he suits up. Fantasy managers should monitor Thursday and Friday practice notes, expect a limited workload if active, and have a pivot ready in the late window.

Garrett Nussmeier, QB – LSU
LSU’s playoff hopes took a scare when Garrett Nussmeier dealt with a lingering abdominal strain that curtailed portions of his weekly prep. While surgery has not been considered and he’s trending in the right direction after extra rest, torque and comfort on deep balls bear watching. Expect the staff to manage practice, then let him go if soreness cooperates. Fantasy outlook, startable with tempered expectations and a backup plan.

Kenan Sadiq, TE – Oregon
Oregon’s offense is holding its breath after Kenan Sadiq surfaced on the injury report with an undisclosed issue, putting his weekend availability in doubt. The Ducks use his size on seams and red zone crossers, so any limitation pushes more targets to the perimeter and RB checkdowns. For fantasy managers in deeper formats, track pregame reports closely and stash a contingency at tight end in case he’s held out or limited.

💥 Dumpster Fire 5 – Pain Rankings

Think of the Dumpster Fire 5 as a weekly pain index, not a power ranking. It tracks programs actively melting on live TV, judged by bad losses, collapsing game plans, coaching heat, injury chaos, and vibes that smell like burnt rubber.

Oregon State Beavers
Record: 0–6, preseason AP rank: Unranked
Oregon State looked like a respectable rebuild, instead the Beavers are winless and already rearranging deck chairs. After a 27–23 faceplant at App State, Trent Bray fired special teams coordinator Jamie Christian and the AD promised a program review, which is admin-speak for we smell smoke. Special teams gaffes and late-game stalls have directly led to losses, and it is their worst start since 1991. Momentum leaks are real, and until someone actually closes a game, every Saturday feels dangerously close to oh-no mode.

North Carolina Tar Heels
Record: 2–3, preseason AP rank: Unranked
From splash-hire curiosity to PR humidity dome, UNC scrapped its in-season Hulu doc as a 2–3 start turned the narrative sticky. The Heels were boat-raced 38–10 by Clemson after trailing 28–3 in the first quarter, then spent the week answering questions about culture and direction. That is not the brand they ordered. Bill Belichick is hearing the hot seat sizzle while penalties and protection issues linger. With Cal looming, watching confidence bleed away in real time feels dangerously close to oh-no mode.

Oklahoma State Cowboys
Record: 1–4, preseason AP rank: Unranked
The Cowboys were supposed to stabilize, instead Arizona detonated them 41–13 and pushed the record into crisis territory. Quarterback roulette, protection issues, and explosive plays allowed turned a measuring-stick trip into a measuring-cup of sadness. Coaches are trying to piece together answers while the defense gets overmatched in every phase. Houston is next, but until someone seizes QB1 and the front seven stops surrendering chunk plays, this dumpster sparkle risks open flame. Bowl math is already coughing smoke and patience is short.

Texas Longhorns
Record: 3–2, preseason AP rank: No. 1
Texas looked like a playoff outfit in August, then face-planted 29–21 at Florida and fell out of the poll, reopening every old argument about big-game ceiling. Steve Sarkisian spent the week defending the program’s culture while the pass pro sprung leaks and the red-zone plan felt expensive but fragile. The Longhorns are bleeding momentum, and the timing could not be worse with Red River demanding poise, not press clippings. Beat Oklahoma and breathe, lose and the hot seat sizzle around assistants starts to hum.

Penn State Nittany Lions
Record: 3–2, preseason AP rank: No. 2
Preseason top-2 juice met a Pasadena pratfall, as winless UCLA stunned Penn State 42–37 in the season’s biggest upset by spread. Explosive plays surrendered, situational defense MIA, and a late rally that looked like lipstick on a four-alarm. That is a contender turning into a content machine for the wrong reasons. With Big Ten fists still looming, this could snowball fast unless the secondary tightens and the offense finds a crunch-time answer. CFP hopes took a hit, and the fan patience meter is twitchy.

🎲 The Spread Option

The college football slate is a chaos buffet, and last week we loaded up on all the wrong trays. Consider this our public apology to bankrolls everywhere. We are tightening up, riding Tier 1 factors only, and banning vibes-only plays until further notice. The goal this week is simple, fewer fireworks, more closing line value, and zero charity donations to the sportsbook…..and we have fun!

Record Last Week: 2-3
Season Total: 8-19-1

🔥 “Show-Me Don’t Tell Me” Game
Alabama Crimson Tide at Missouri Tigers — Alabama -3.5 (FanDuel)
Bama’s defense has stopped gifting red-zone candy, and Missouri’s glossy start came with some schedule softening. Short number for a blue blood, but early kick keeps the home-field edge muted.
Pick: Missouri +3.5.

🧱 Big Ten Rock Fight — O/U Feature
Iowa Hawkeyes at Wisconsin Badgers — (FanDuel)
Both offenses prefer three yards and a cloud of existential dread. Field position, punting, and third-and-7 draw plays are the vibe. Low totals tax mistakes, but these two treat explosives like contraband.
Pick: Under 35.5.

🤠 Hat Check: Red River Edition
Oklahoma Sooners vs Texas Longhorns — Texas -2.5 (FanDuel)
Neutral site, split crowd, cardiac swings. Texas still owns the better early-down efficiency, and Oklahoma’s QB situation has kept the market jittery. If Sark scripts cleanly, margin can live.
Pick: Oklahoma +2.5.

🌵 Desert Litmus Test
BYU Cougars at Arizona Wildcats — BYU -1.5 (DraftKings)
Unbeaten BYU brings a real defense to Tucson against an Arizona team that wobbles when chasing. If the Cougars win the explosives and turnover battle, the short chalk pays.
Pick: BYU -1.5.

🌲 Autzen Stress Test
No. 3 Oregon Ducks vs No. 7 Indiana Hoosiers — Oregon -7.5 (FanDuel)
Indiana's Cinderella story gets its first real road exam in the loudest venue in the Big Ten. The Ducks' edge rush and home-field chaos should expose whether the Hoosiers are playoff-built or schedule-fed. Oregon's physicality in the trenches and balanced attack wear down visitors, and Indiana hasn't seen this level of speed and crowd noise yet.
Pick: Oregon -7.5.

So there you have it: $50 million can't buy wins yet, cameras can't save a bad season, and rivalry games don't care about your analytics. October will continue to humble the confident and reward the delusional, exactly as designed. Keep your Saturdays clear, your takes questionable, and your kicker on speed dial. This sport doesn't make sense, but that's never stopped us before.

We'll see you in the wreckage.

— The Convert on Fourth Down Team

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